So you’ve done it: You’ve decided to elope instead of having a big wedding, and now you’re preparing for the big day in every way you can. Because eloping in this meaningful way is still relatively new and underreported on, you might have a hard time finding blog posts like “How to Keep Stress Levels Low on your Elopement Day” or “How to Prepare for Your Elopement Day Hike”, this is where I come in!

After helping dozens and dozens of couples plan their elopement and make it one of THE all-time best days of their lives, I’ve learned a thing or two about what pushes the day towards incredible and unforgettable, and I’m here to share their experiences with you. Everything from managing your expectations when getting married outdoors to showing you how to really relish the day and make it deeply memorable.

Let’s jump in!!

Remember why you’re doing this

It’s the day you’re saying yes to your favorite person, your other half, your teammate for life. It’s where you’ll create some new memories that you’ll look back on for the rest of your lives. It’s the day that you have been looking forward to for quite some time.

When it comes down to it, that’s literally the only thing that matters.

Set Expectations

With every important day you’ll experience in life, having a level-headed approach when it comes to expectations is key. Sure, you definitely deserve to get excited and be antsy when the day comes around! But spending all of your mental and physical energy trying to plan every last detail and minute will leave you feeling a little bit disappointed when the day comes around. It’s inevitable!

Pick a few things that are crucial to your day being what you want it to be - that could be experiencing the general location or type of scenery, writing the most perfect vows, or feeling a specific way at some point during the elopement day. I think it’s completely valid to want to cling to these kinds of things turning out like you planned on your wedding day - it’s more about the general vibe than the tiny little details that aren’t nearly as important.

Notice how I didn’t mention things like the perfect outfit, the perfect first look, or the perfect weather. Know why?

Shit happens.

And you should expect at least some shit to happen on your elopement day. Whether that’s forgetting something you really wanted to wear back in your cabin, your cute little wedding cake getting a dent in the side of it while in the backseat of your car, or an entire cloud rolls in and hides all the epic views you were planning for - your day isn’t ruined! You planned for this! It’s not all falling apart, I promise!

Going into your elopement day with a clear head, a touch of hopefulness, and the ability to be flexible and cool as a cucumber even with things get a little shaken up is a great way to approach the day. Do your best!

Be prepared

Remember how I just told you that shit happens? You wanna know the secret to being prepared for everything? BE PREPARED, MY FRIEND.

That can look a few different ways:

Bringing extra layers just in case the temperature isn’t what you expected it to be
Pack an umbrella or two in the car for the inevitable PNW rain drizzle
Bring some essentials in your day bag to keep you comfy - water and snacks, a mirror and touch up kit if you’re wearing makeup, scissors or a knife, and extra hair pins to tuck in flyaways
Have a backup location at the ready (I will help you with this part!)
Download maps, music, and other things you might not be able to access if you don’t have service

I’m a list kind of person, and maybe you’re not one to write lists for every aspect of your life, but this is definitely one day where you want a tangible list to run through! Think about things like the small details: ring boxes, vow books, marriage license, a black pen to sign said marriage license, and all the other little things you might need to look and feel your best (and get the best photos!)

Pick a reasonable hike

If you’ve chosen to include hiking on your elopement day, triple-check that it’s well within your physical limitations! There are some amazing trails out there that require a good amount of effort, but no view is worth pushing your body and mind to their limits on a day that’s meant to be laid back and low-stress.

Consider factors like elevation gain, terrain challenges, how warm or cold it will be while hiking the most difficult parts, and how you’ll feel once we reach our destination.

Consider a Weekday

In just about every location on the planet, from grocery stores to National Parks, everywhere is going to be more busy on the weekends (and holidays!). If you’re feeling the stress of being around too many other park visitors or not being able to find parking at your location, consider that a weekday might be more suitable, even if it means taking an extra few days off of work or shifting your travel plans.

Keep your comfort level in mind

If you’re anything like me, I can get overwhelmed by simple things like too much sun, slightly uncomfy clothes, or moving constantly for hours on end. Run through the day and try to pick out any points that could push you to your limits of being comfortable.

For example, if you’re eloping with guests, you might want to spend part of the day with everyone, but still set aside a portion of the day for just you two (with or without your photographer!). Family and friends can still be stressful even when you’re not planning a big wedding, so prioritize what will make you feel your absolute best!!

Slow down and breathe

No matter what could go wrong, no matter how terrible the weather is, no matter how many things you forgot at home before flying to your elopement location, this is your wedding day!! Getting caught up in the stress of it is normal, so be intentional when you’re with your person. Schedule time to just exist. Do something slowly together like making breakfast, copying your vows into your vow books while snuggled up on the couch, or take a drive with your favorite music. This is your day and you get to move as slowly as you want!!

be kind to yourself in the mirror

Trust me, every person getting married has a moment where they don’t like the way something looks or are worried about how the photos will turn out. This might be the first time you’ve had your photos professionally taken, so you’re already thinking about how certain parts of you look when you’re just being yourself.

Friend, I promise you are gonna look BEYOND incredible.

The way you look at your partner will always trump how your side profile looks in a photo. The way you let out a good belly laugh will always trump how much your eyes squint when you laugh from the heart. The way you lean into your person and take in their presence will always trump what you think is an unflattering angle.

If you’re having trouble with your self-image and how you’re going to look on your wedding day, try this: think about the way you look at your partner. The way their imperfections are what you love most, the way they’re so uniquely themselves around you, the way they look and act when they’re comfortable and in your presence. It might not look like what you’d see on a magazine cover, because it’s not supposed to.

Now put yourself in your partner’s shoes. The way THEY love your imperfections, your uniqueness, your presence. That’s all that matters. They are your person, and they are excited to spend the day with you regardless of how you look. How you feel will always top how you look, even when you’re being photographed.

And one more time before you go…

Remember why you’re eloping.

At the end of the day, that’s all that matters. Every minute detail isn’t going to be perfect, and that’s perfect in itself. Leave room for last-minute changes, pivoting, and accepting that sometimes things just don’t go to plan. You’ll have one hell of an elopement day with that kind of mindset, I can promise you that.